Tonight’s batchelor party (not mine, thank god) was fuckin’ fantastic. I wish I’d brought something classier than High Life, but the entertainment more than made up for it. She was a great dancer (didn’t go inverted, though… ) and, somehow, reminded me of the first girl I ever had a crush on, an epileptic twin who smelled like baby powder and lilacs. Or maybe I’m conflating her with an eraser I won in a spelling bee while I was crushing on her — I’m sure you know how that happens.
Or maybe I’m just saying all that because I’m drunk.
Here’s to postponed jury duty!
Er… I think I broke my nose.